Wheel of Time WHAT?

Freakshow: Good News? http://www.dragonmount.com/News/?p=326
Me: Who the hell is Brandon Sanderson? I don’t think I have read anything of his? Why didn’t Jordan choose someone as his heir? Christ on a cracker it is the oldest storyline in history…
Freakshow: I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT you HAVE NOT EVER HEARD OF THIS GUY - YOU HAVE MORE OF THESE BOOKS THAN THE AVERAGE BARNES AND NOBLE
Me: Don’t yell at me because I haven’t read some 2 bit author. He’s done what 4 or 5 books, dude I can read 4 or 5 books a week…well before Timmy. Most of the series I read are longer than 4 or 5 books. Have YOU read his BOOKS bucko?
Freakshow: I DONT READ
Me: So now I have to go get his books and then you have to read them TOO (meaning also) so we can figure out if this last book is even going to be worth it?
Freakshow: I don’t see the point - we HAVE to read the last book - no matter how bad - This guy DOES clearly know HOW the book was supposed to end in detail - so even if he hacks it up you can't claim he was inventing it. If you want to know how it ends you have to read the book - good or bad
Me: The point my pointy headed friend is if he bites THE BIG ONE, if he rots in hell, if he writes like… (I don’t really have anyone that makes my eyes bleed, your wife’s anti-christ is Lackey, but I don’t give a rat’s ass where she puts comas or her dangling participles), what if our head explodes in the first chapter, what are we gonna do then chumley?
Freakshow: ok, if his writing is so bad that it makes your eyes bleed - WHY oh WHY would you read MORE THAN ONE of his books then? The last book is worth it by default - because it has all the answers in it - even if it is translated from sumali dialect, we NEED to read the last book - at least there will BE a last book to read
Me: So what you are saying/agreeing to, is if I purchase a book by said author and it makes my eyeballs bleed and burst and get mushy and dribble down my cheeks you will read me the LAST book even if it is written in Runes?
Well – ok then I guess we have a book to read in 2009
Freakshow: if you can’t see you won’t be able to tell if I am making up the story or reading it to you - so sure
Me: You are an AssHAT.
What if he is good? What if he is better than Jordan? What if we become slaves to his series? What if your eyeballs rupture and I have to read to you, my lying friend? You know your family would allow me to read to YOU
Freakshow: 3 words for you - BOOKS ON TAPE
Me: Brandon Sanderson has books on tape? That’s great, I can listen when I am driving to Needham, and if you are nice to me maybe I will let you borrow them
Freakshow: http://www.audiobookstand.com/product.asp?AuthorId=21972&Titleid=55930

And that my friends is love…