Quotes to make me giggle

1. As I let go of my feelings of guilt, I am in touch with my inner sociopath.

2. I have the power to channel my imagination into ever-soaring levels of suspicion and paranoia
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3. I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else's fault.

4. I no longer need to punish, deceive, or compromise myself, unless I want to stay employed.

5. In some cultures what I do would be considered normal.

6. Having control over myself is almost as good as having control over others.

7. My intuition nearly makes up for my lack of self-judgment.

8. I honor my personality flaws for without them I would have no personality at all.

9. Joan of Arc heard voices, too.

10. I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me.

11. I need not suffer in silence while I can still moan, whimper and complain.

12. As I learn the innermost secrets of people around me, they reward me in many ways to keep me quiet.

13. When someone hurts me, I know that forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit, but not nearly as gratifying.

14. The first step is to say nice things about myself. The second, to do nice things for myself. The third, to find someone to buy me nice things.

15. As I learn to trust the universe, I no longer need to carry a gun.

16. All of me is beautiful, even the ugly, stupid and disgusting parts.

17. I am at one with my duality.

18. Blessed are the flexible, for they can tie themselves into knots.

19. Only a lack of imagination saves me from immobilizing myself with imaginary fears.

20. I will strive to live each day as if it were my 50th birthday.

21. I honor and express all facets of my being, regardless of state and local laws.

22. Today I will gladly share my experience and advice, for there are no sweeter words than "I told you so!"

23. False hope is better than no hope at all.

24. A good scapegoat is almost as good as a solution.

25. Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my underwear in the Hollywood Cafe. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.

26. Who can I blame for my problems? Just give me a minute.... I'll find someone.

27. Why should I waste my time reliving the past when I can spend it worrying about the future?

28. The complete lack of evidence is the surest sign that the conspiracy is working.

29. I am learning that criticism is not nearly as effective as sabotage.

30. Becoming aware of my character defects leads me naturally to the next step of blaming my parents.

31. To have a successful relationship, I must learn to make it look like I'm giving as much as I'm getting.

32. I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.

33. Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.

Book Review: Mort

Disk world

Mort had a problem. His family was well known for its ability to distill wine from reannual grapes. You know the kind that gives you a headache the day before you drink it. The headache is so bad you have to drink tons to get rid of it. That in and of itself wasn’t a problem. The real issue was that Mort had as much of a green thumb as a dead starfish.

Then he becomes Death’s apprentice. What with the steed, the scythe and the hourglasses, what could go wrong?

But then there was this princess…

Knitting projects 1-10

So, I don’t know if you remember me talking about knitting back in….November. But I have actually been busy these past few months, and I have the photos to prove it

My hat – too big

Spotty’s hat, done on a size smaller needle, but still too big

Boy Toy’s hat, done on even smaller needles, but still too big. I am having SERIOUS issues with my gauge. Never had a problem before, I think having Spotty changed me in more ways than I anticipated.

What was going to be my boss’s scarf, but once I started working on it realized that this was so not her, but was totally me.

The stole I started for my boss.

I had to stop the stole so I could start this hat for me. Again using even smaller needles, still too Fin big

Spotty’s hat – you guessed it even smaller needles, too big. Boy toy thinks it fits him fine, I think he is smoking the good stuff and not sharing. I unfortunately did not have time to do a hat for him for his family photo extravaganza.

Back to stole

Stop stole – drop stitch, can’t figure out how to fix it, have to ask for a friends help, but she is busy. What to do while I wait…

Spotty needed a neck thingy, but I was paranoid that he would strangle himself with a scarf. Note – This yarn was purchased 8 years ago. Never knew what to do with it. These are the colors of Spotty’s fall and winter coats (god bless Hanna Anderson).

Go back to stole

Stop stole

Baby blanket for co-worker in UK

Back to stole – STOLE STOLE STOLE!!!

Stop stole - drop stitch, can’t figure out how to fix it, have to ask for a friends help, but she is busy. What to do while I wait…see book reviews

Go back to stole

Stop stole – friend is adopting a baby. Will hopefully pick up baby This week. Her mom passes away on Sunday night. I go to house to wait for baby furniture, finish blanket. Forget to take photo.

Looks like this, but just in blue.

Go back to stole…

Book Review: Fool Moon

Book Two of the Dresden Files

Harry is back at it with new friends and enemies.

Harry: Werewolves jumping through windows at gangster’s lackeys in unfinished restaurants. A mangled corpse in the middle of a blood-drenched floor. Berserk FBI field agents drawing guns and shooting to kill. A little kung fu, a little John Wayne, and a few casual threats. So far…just one more night on the job.

Harry: “Cheer up Harry. I told myself. “You’re just going to go poke around a biker gang’s lair. Ask them if they happen to have killed some people lately. What could possibly go wrong?”

Harry: “So there I was being strangled by a ranting, half-naked madman in the middle of the woods, with a she-werewolf dangling from a rope snare somewhere nearby. My gunshot wound hurt horribly, and my jaw throbbed from where my buddy the cop had brutalized it the night before. I’ve had worse days. That’s the great thing about being a wizard. I can always tell myself, honestly, that things could be worse.

Harry: “A stuffed animal, man!” I roared at him. “Don’t mess with a wizard when he’s wizarding”.

Have you started reading yet?

1 in 4...

Did you know that 1 in 4 women will experience some form of domestic violence in their lives? 1 in 4. Do you know 4 women? Have you seen 4 women on a bus, train or airplane? Seen 4 women while shopping, driving, walking, running?

We know that 4 out of 5 dentists prefer Trident. Why aren't we quoting 1 in 4? Is it because it's ugly, painful, shameful, disheartening, inconceivable?

I found this info thanks to Mojo. He is generally witty, charming and a pain in the ass all rolled into one. He is also helping promote a new website called Violence Unsilenced

Maggie from Okay, Fine Dammit is running things and is giving a voice to those that seem to have nothing else.

I have a button thingy and I am putting it on top so everyone who chances upon my blog will see it.

1 in 4.

Maybe the 1 will stumble on this and go there and realize she (or he) is not alone. Maybe you who are reading this now know of a 1 or think you do. Find out how to help. Because in saving the 1 you could save us all.

Unsilence the violence - http://violenceunsilenced.com/